Love Idaho Style

Well, the great State of Idaho got a bit of a black eye courtesy of 3-term U.S. Senator Larry Craig. I hope for the sake of his family and fellow Idahoans that the Senator did not in fact solicit sex in the bathroom at the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport. It is of particular importance that if it indeed turns out to be true then the Moral Majority has lost a vocal supporter. Senator Craig is up for reelection in 2008. You can bet he will not receive my vote. I can put up with a guy who just made an honest mistake or even has a few character flaws. But a hypocrite, well that's a tougher pill to swallow. Senator Craig's record in Congress has reflected the values of his constituents: pro opposite-sex marriage, anti-gay in the military, conservative, demanding better schools, lower taxes and strong enforcement of immigration laws that keep illegal aliens out of the country. To find out that this dichotomy of conservative legislator and alleged participant in gay sex exists is tough for both me and Mitch to swallow.

I was watching liberal fuzzbag Larry King's program last night and he had on his panel of guests Dr. Drew Pinsky (of Loveline fame co hosted by Adam Corolla) on the panel. I almost flipped past it, but he made a statement which floggle-plated me so much that I hit rewind on my DVR to make sure that I didn't misunderstand it. Dr. Drew was asked what percentage of the American population was gay. He said no one knew for sure, but the 10% number is thrown around alot. He also said that AIDS research has shown a growing group of men have sex with other men but are not gay. How the hell does that work? "Well officer, I was walking through the park minding my own business and whoops my wedding tackle fell into a chicken eye that just happened to be there, but I'm not gay!" I could see maybe one time a guy (or a lady) tries it out Freshman year in college to see what it might be like. Somehow my gut tells me that after that initial trial offer that you would definitely know that you were or were not gay.

My own cooter is a boy's only zone, reserved for making precious babies for Jesus. I have yet to field any marriage proposals, but should the right fella ask, then he will have exclusive access paradise. Ladies take heed: yes I am devastatingly beautiful, yes I am adventurous, yes I like to party, yes I have a prosthetic limb and yes, I am a natural blonde. But I am 100% man candy, sweets for the sweet. You must have an XY set of chromosomes to take me home. That's my policy. As for the alleged misconduct on behalf of Senator Craig, he has already been shot, stabbed, tarred and feathered in the court of public opinion. I hope that he has the decency to resign and open a hamburger stand. I will eat at that hamburger stand and tell him when I see him that if he had a fidelity problem, next time go with fat female interns from California. You can't even get impeached for that.